I went to my stepsister's college graduation this past weekend. Which caused me to think back on my college graduation. Which I was very ambivalent about going to (although I ultimately did). Which caused me to think back to the root cause of my aversion to rituals. Which is this:
When I was a sophomore in high school, the ten girls with the highest GPAs were invited to participate in the senior graduation as an "Honor Guard" (no, it's not what you're thinking). In this case, what "Honor Guard" meant was that we were instructed to go buy a fancy (read "prom") dress and then, at the ceremony, we were each entrusted with a bo-peep crook (I'm not kidding), complete with bow. It was our "honor" to lead the graduation procession across the football field and then form a double row (like they do at weddings), hooks the crooks and form an archway for the graduating seniors to proceed through. So, yes, basically we were portable decorations.
Why I went through with actually participating in this, I'm not sure. I do remember standing at the front of the line (another "honor" extending to me for being...shortest) and just before we started calling back over my shoulder to my fellow HGs, "Just remember, this is RETARDED."
Watching the ceremony from this undignified position led me, I guess, to see that it was all just "pomp and circumstance" or, to borrow another reference "sound and fury, signifying nothing." This is why when I came time for my own high school graduation, I was ambivalent about going and, as mentioned above, felt the same about my college graduation. It is also why, when I got married, I designed a ceremony that lasted 10 minutes, tops.
In the years since, I have had the opportunity to attend some really beautiful and meaningful ceremonies, and so have recaptured some small measure of my appreciation for them.
But not for college graduations. Those are just boring. (Sorry Sis! I still love ya!)
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The Sagacious Empathy
1 week ago
1 comment:
Since I played the flute in the concert band, I HAD to play at all the gratuations from 5th Grade (minus 8th since I was actually graduating) through Junior Year of High School. It was the same EVERY year, sometimes outside, sometimes inside if it rained... but the same boring, stupid ceremony...different faces. It made me want to rise above it all, stand out. So at my elementary school I made sure I was on the High Honor Role so I could give a speech. In high school, (even though I was graduating with honors) I rebelled (long-story) and shook hands with the superintendent with a prophylactic in my hand. It was a legit protest carried out by the entire class. In college, I didn't shake hands with the dean as he handed me my degree sheath and honor cord(another long story). I enjoyed my wedding ceremony because Rob and I worked with the pastor so he said only what we really believe and feel. The kids baptisms were okay for the same reason. But all in all, I'm not a big fan of all the pomp etc. myself. As a parent, however, BRING ON THE CEREMONIES AND I'LL BRING MY TISSUES...sell-out, maybe...PROUD mommy, YOU BET!!! :-)
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