Friday, July 25, 2008

Read This Blog!

Ok, I don't mean this blog, I mean this blog.

Here's the sales pitch. My cousin Paul and his wife Rebecca sublet their townhouse in Alexandria, VA and decamped with their two small children to Ecuador for 3 months so that Rebecca could volunteer for Asylum Access, non-profit organization that provides free legal assistance to Colombian refugees in Ecuador.

I am completely awestruck by this. The work that Rebecca and Asylum Access is doing is just fantastic and the logistical challenges of doing this with 2 small children is daunting. And Paul, the main author of the blog, is pretty funny.

Anyway, he's been blogging for months and they are actually coming to the end of their 3-month stay, but better late than never, right?

So, without further ado, I bid thee to check out Adventures of the Cuy.

Thursday, July 24, 2008

On a Happier Note

I just realized I never gave you all the details of the hubby's Fabulous Birthday Surprise Weekend.

As reported earlier, the only information I gave him in advance was to "Obey your wife."

So, on Friday morning, we left the apartment and went to Anthony David's (the hubby's favorite) for brunch.


After brunch, we went for a little walk to the Northeast end of town. He couldn't figure out where we were heading, because there isn't really anything at the Northeast end of town...except:


So, we took the ferry to Manhattan.

At this point, we were a little ahead of schedule and thus had time for a detour to:

(Also one of the hubby's favorite places.)

Then, it was back to the riverfront for a 2-hour sail aboard:

(By the way, I got the tickets at almost 1/2 price from Goldstar.)

Post-sail, we were once again ahead of schedule and so had time for quick drink at the Chelsea Brewing Company:
(Who even knew this place was there?? Definitely a good find.)

Next, we hopped in a cab and headed back to Union Square for:


Finally, we capped off the day with dinner at the hubby's favorite restaurant, Cacio e Pepe:


After all that, he figured the bulk of his birthday celebration was over. Thus, on Saturday, we had a relaxing morning at home (actually, I ran out and did a couple of errands). At 2pm, we left the apartment and started walking to the Northwest corner of Hoboken. Once again, the hubby was perplexed because, once again, there isn't really anything in the Northwest corner of Hoboken. EXCEPT the BMW I had picked up from Zipcar and parked a couple of blocks from the apartment when I had done my errands. We got in the car and I told him our ultimately destination was a secret, but that we needed to stop at my mom's first. He didn't quite buy this--he figured my mom and her hubby were coming with us somewhere. When we pulled onto her street he saw the large quantity of cars and figured out there was a party, but even so, was still surprised at the people who were there: friends my high school and grammar school, a friend from work, both his parents, his uncle who flew up from North Carolina, etc.

So, all in all, it was a successful birthday weekend.

Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Heartbroken

When I was first diagnosed with breast cancer, I didn't want to join a support group because, let's face it, in a disease-driven support group, not everyone is going to have a good outcome (or, in blunter terms, survive).

But, somehow, I found the Young Survival Coalition bulletin boards and joined an amazing online community of women going through what I was going through.

I've written about it before in this space. It's an amazing place. It's also a horrible place, because on a site with thousands of members, you're bound to come across those who don't "have the good outcome."

Today I learned that a dear "virtual" friend of mine died on Sunday.

When I first joined the YSC boards, there was a small group of women who became my de facto mentors, essentially by virtue of the fact that they were done with their treatment and I hadn't yet started mine. They were the ones out there as living testaments: this is doable, you WILL make it through this, and you will come out on the other side strong and beautiful. Lola was one of these women. She was tough, she was fiery, she liked to stir things up on the boards--she did not placate. She was straight-talking, funny, flawed, smart, sassy. Her nickname was "the Tartan Terror."

I never met Lola in person, primarily because she lived in Scotland, but I've read (and probably responded to) hundreds of her posts and we had exchanged a few emails over the last year.

In November, when Lola was diagnosed with metastatic breast cancer, I was one of hundreds of YSCers who sent money to Scotland so that her darling daughter could have a great Christmas.

Now, contrary to popular belief, metastatic BC (aka "mets," aka Stage IV) is not an immediate death sentence. There are lots of women on the boards who've had it for years, some who've had "no evidence of disease" (aka, been "NED") for years. So for Lola to go so quickly is just an unfathomable shock.

I am so sad for her, her family and all the other YSC sisters we've lost this year: MamaCath, Shabana, Jayme, Jessica...

I generally try not to write about the sad YSC stuff in this space because I don't want to depress you, my Dear Reader, by writing about the deaths of people you don't know. But I also assume you read this blog because you're interested in how I'm doing and so you should know that, today, the answer is, "heartbroken."

PSA: Estrogenius Festival Auditions

estrogenius 2008 auditions

1. All Estrogenius auditions will be held at Manhattan Theatre Source (177
MacDougal Street, NYC 10011) July 25 – August 17 (the schedule is listed
below).
2. Actors sign up for a five-minute time slot at Manhattan Theatre Source.
3. Auditions are from sides.
4. All of the plays are available for IN HOUSE reading ONLY.
5. Actors will audition in front of the five directors for that week. Any director may invite an actor to callbacks.
6. Actors must be available for callbacks, rehearsals, tech and performance.
7. No plays are pre-cast, but writers and directors may invite actors directly to
callbacks.
8. Executive Producers and Week Producers may invite up to two actors to callbacks for each play.

THE AUDITION SCHEDULE

WEEK 1
Dead Soap by Bekah Brunstetter; What Mommy Told Me by Paula Caplan; Child of the Movement by Cheryl Davis; Tumble Jumble by Andrea Lepcio; Fag Hag by Montserrat Mendez
Open Call: Fri., July 25th from 1pm – 6pm & Sat., July 26th from 10am – 1pm
Callbacks: Sun., July 27th from 10am – 3pm (1 hour per play)

WEEK 2
Waffles by Martha Garvey; Foreign Policy by J.J. Hunt; The Perfect Plan by John McKinney; Madrigal in Black and White by Patricia Montley; Yog Sothoth by Lia Romeo
Open Call: Fri., Aug. 1st from 2pm – 6pm & Sat., Aug. 2nd from 12pm – 4pm
Callbacks: Sun., Aug. 3rd from 10am – 3pm (1 hour per play)

WEEK 3
Canyon’s Edge by Barbara Lindsay; Buy & Buy by Pamela Monk; Free Fall by Char Nelson; Turtle Beach by Aoise Stratford; and Maneater by Janet Zarecor
Open Call: Fri., Aug. 8th from 2pm – 6pm & Sat., Aug. 9th from 12pm – 4pm
Callbacks: Sun., Aug. 10th from 10am – 3pm (1 hour per play)

WEEK 4
New York, New York by Lane Bernes; Safety First by Danna Call; Parkersburg by Laura
Jacqmin; On the Beach by Lucile Lichtblau; Little Birds by Joy McCullough-Carranza;
Open Call: Fri., Aug. 15th from 2pm – 6pm & Sat., Aug. 16th from 12pm – 4pm
Callbacks: Sun, Aug. 17th from 10am – 3pm (1 hour per play)


estrogenius FAQ
Can I audition for more than one play in a week?
IF there’s time in your slot, you may read for another play. You are certainly free to express to all the directors (you’ll be seen by a rep from each play & any of them can call you back) all the plays in which you have interest.

Can I audition for more than one week?
There is NO DOUBLE CASTING in Estrogenius. Once you are cast, you must stop auditioning. Until you are cast, you are free to audition for all subsequent weeks. (The only exceptions are walk on or under five roles)

Should I mail in/drop off/email a headshot/resume before auditions?
All pics/resumes dropped off before the date of your audition will go into our general files. Bring 3-5 pics/resumes each week you come to open call.

Are any of the plays pre-cast?
No.

When do the sign up sheets go up for weeks 2-4?
Sign up sheets go up the Monday before the auditions. This gives us a chance to make sure we’ve notified all those cast in the previous week so actors know whether they’re eligible to keep auditioning.

Is Estrogenius an Equity showcase?
Yes. We will be casting Equity & non-Equity actors.

Is there pay?
We wish. Estrogenius is entirely run by volunteers.

Can I take scripts home or copy them?
NO. All reading is IN HOUSE ONLY. Please respect our writers & leave scripts here.

When are sides available?
Sides will be available by noon on the day of auditions.

Are there roles for men?
Of course. There are roles for men & women, various ages & types.

Tuesday, July 22, 2008

Cult Update

For the second week straight, I posted a 0.6lb loss, which is kind of remarkable considering all the sparkling wine I had on Saturday (but, hey, that's what bonus points are for, right?).

In Scrabble terms, it's one of these:


Anyway, I am still slightly (very slightly) above my 10% goal, so watch this space for future rejoicing.

I Have a....Bleory?

Actually, I have a friend who has coined a new term, but he doesn't have a blog to publicize it so I offered to do the honors:

Bleory - a proposed explanation which was pulled directly from one’s ass and has little to no support, as opposed to a theory, a proposed explanation whose status is still conjectural - but actually HAS some reasonable basis to be believed. A bleory exists exclusively on the internet and is typically found in blog entries.

Monday, July 21, 2008

If Only

...I had a spare $25K lying around: Douglas Adams' typewriter

My Fairy Tale

Once upon a time, there was a Boy. He was a very normal Boy—at least by Earth’s standards. He liked to tease his little sister, play with blocks and do other Normal Boy Stuff.

Then, one day, the aliens came and replaced the Normal Boy with an AlienBoy.

The AlienBoy looked exactly like the Normal Boy, but if you paid attention, you would notice some differences. For example, the AlienBoy didn’t hold his mug the way a Normal Boy would. He’d stick his thumb through the little handle and wrap his fingers over the top of the handle (rather than, like a Normal Boy, sticking his index and middle finger in the handle and wrapping his thumb around). He also held his fork really weird.

But, for the most part, he acted a lot like the Normal Boy and so no one really noticed that there had been a change, not even his parents.

Like a regular Earthling, he grew up and, like some Earthlings, got married. It was when he met his future Wife that some of the other Signs began to reveal themselves. For instance, he didn’t possess some of the regular knowledge common in the part of the world in which he lived, such as that Babe Ruth had played for the Yankees. And he was very climatically unsuited to Earth, often insisting it was unbearably hot even on days when a lovely breeze was blowing.

He also had a terrible, terrible memory (probably because his mind was full of remembering how to—mostly—act like he was from Earth) and almost no short-term memory at all. This is an actual conversation between the Boy (well, at this point in the story I suppose we shall have to call him a Man) and his Wife:

AlienMan: Who said they thought Monty Python was a person?
Wife: Clay Aiken.
AlienMan: And who was talking about this?
Wife: I was.
AlienMan: And who were you talking about it with?
Wife: Our Friend.
AlienMan: And who said they thought Monty Python was a person?
Wife: You’re kidding, right?

From all these Signs, one may have thought that the marriage would be doomed but, fortunately, the Wife realized there were benefits to being married to AlienMan. First of all, he didn’t like Sports. Any Sports. At all. Since a Normal Man in the part of the world where the Alien Man lived spent approximately (conservatively) 8 years of his life watching Sports on television, the fact that Alien Man was not interested in sports meant the couple had plenty of time for other activities, such as Shopping.

The AlienMan was not hung up on lots other Normal Man things, like hiding his emotions, and so the Wife always knew she was loved and cherished. The AlienMan was also not afraid of looking silly, which led them to have many, many Fun Times.

One day, the AlienMan turned 40. On Earth, this was considered a Milestone and so his Wife (with lots of help), to mark the occasion, threw a big Surprise Party with 40 guests.

The guests were a very mixed group, with some who had known AlienMan since he was a Boy and others who had met him more recently. Many thought he was Strange, but none actually knew he was an Alien.

And his Wife never told anyone and so they lived Happily Ever After.

Thursday, July 17, 2008

And yet more evidence of craziness...

Last night, I was sitting out on our terrace for a bit while my husband was ostensibly at the other end of our railroad apartment watching TV or reading or something.

Later, when we were both in bed, he said, "So, who were you on the phone with while you were on the terrace?" I nonchalantly replied, "Oh, I gave my Mom a quick call." Him: "What were you talking about? You were talking in a very hushed tone--it sounded important." Me: "Good thing I was talking in a hushed tone, since you were obviously eavesdropping." End of conversation.

Yep, He's Still Crazy...

Well, you'll be entertained to know that the ploys (and pleas) to discover the weekend plans have continued.

Last night we went out for Middle Eastern food and my husband was introduced to Turkish coffee (which purportedly is 3x as strong as espresso). As a direct result of this, when I was trying to go to sleep last night at around 11:30pm, he was grilling me for info:

Him: What are we doing this weekend? What time do you have thing planned to start on Friday? How late can I sleep? Can I sleep until 10?

Me: (pause) No.

Him: Can I sleep in until 9?

Me: (sleepy pause) Yes.

Him: WHAT ARE WE DOING? TELL ME WHAT WE'RE DOING! I CAN'T TAKE IT!

Me: (very sleepily) Go to sleep.

Thankfully, he eventually did.

Of course, this morning when he woke me up to say goodbye before heading for work, the first thing he asked (casually and before I was awake) was, "Hey, what are we doing this weekend?" Me: "Nice try."

Wednesday, July 16, 2008

I Have a Theory

I love my CSA (as previously attested to in this space), BUT...

There are certain vegetables that are just not that good and we all just need to accept it and move on to other, yummier veggies.

Here's my theory: If the recommended recipe for any veggie calls for a ridiculous amount of sugar, cheese or bacon, then it's not worth eating. I belong to a CSA because I'm trying to eat healthier. I can eat sugar, cheese or bacon all on my own, thank you. I mean, let's face it, pretty much ANYTHING tastes good smothered in sugar, cheese or bacon, right?

Tuesday, July 15, 2008

How Crazy is My Husband?

(And, perhaps a better question, how crazy has he made me?)

It is the hubby's 40th birthday this weekend and so I have lots of celebratory activities planned. "What do you have planned?" you ask. Well, you see, I can't tell you, because it's a surprise for the hubby.

I told him to block out his planner from Friday morning until Sunday evening and just put "Obey your wife."

Now, since my husband is actually no where near 40, maturity-level-wise, he's been trying to find out what the plans are.

He's tried the old, "I talked to so-and-so today and he told me about the party, so you can just tell me the rest of the details."

He's tried casually asking me, "What are we doing this weekend?" at times when he thinks I'm distracted or when I'm just falling asleep.

And, yesterday, he tried this--I opened an e-mail from him and saw:
HUBBY*: I love you so much! I can't wait to see you to...

(SCUFFLE ENSUES. SOUNDS OF STRUGGLE OFFSTAGE. THE HUSBAND IS TAKEN HOSTAGE BY TWO ARMED MEN IN HOODS)
HUBBY: What the...?!!

ARMED MAN #1: Quiet down, buster and you won't get hurt!

HUBBY: (nervously) What do you want?

ARMED MAN #2: It's actually quite simple. (BEAT) All we want is your itinerary for this weekend.

ARMED MAN #1: And then we will let you go...

HUBBY: But... I don't know what I'm doing this weekend! Honestly... my wife wouldn't tell me!

ARMED MAN #2: Is that her over there, in front of the computer?

HUBBY: Yes.

ARMED MAN #2: (walking up to computer monitor and peering threateningly at the wife) Listen lady! If you want to see your...

HUBBY: Honey! Just tell them what they want! Just answer...

(ARMED MAN #1 belts the husband across thre face. The husband, stunned, falls back, defeated in his chair)

ARMED MAN #2: Keep him quiet! As I was saying... if you want to see your husband again, you better have a good answer to this question... What is he doing this weekend?

WIFE:

*Note: Names have been changed to protect the insane.

So here's what I wrote back:
WIFE: Alright. I'll tell you. But I don't want to ruin the surprise for my husband, so let's take it outside.

ARMED MAN #2: Fair enough. (To Armed Man #1) You keep an eye on this guy. Don't let him move. (To her) Ok. Let's go.

(WIFE and ARMED MAN #2 exit together.)

HUBBY (to Armed Man #1): I need to pee. I'll be right back.

ARMED MAN #1: No way.

HUBBY (pointing over ARMED MAN #1's shoulder): Look! The Winged Victory of Samathrace!

(ARMED MAN #1 doesn't look.)

ARMED MAN #1: We're on to your tricks buster. Just sit still and stay put and everything will be fine.

(WIFE and ARMED MAN #2 re-enter.)

ARMED MAN #2 (to wife): Wow, that really is a cool weekend you have planned. Your husband sure is a lucky guy. (to Armed Man #1) Ok, I'm satisfied. Let 'em go. Let's get out of here.

ARMED MAN #1: You're the boss.

(They exit.)

HUBBY: Honey! You saved my life! Thank you!

(The husband takes his wife in his arms and kisses her passionately.)

BLACKOUT.


Shortly after this, I receive an e-mail from "Robert McKee" with the subject line "Your Screenplay."

Here's what it said:

I liked how you developed your characters... I really got a sense that they were willing to hurt the husband and I felt the husband's fear in your writing...

But you neglected to develop the meat of the story... Where is the conflict? Where is the crisis? What's that you say? Nothing is resolved... it's like a reflection of the real world?

The real world? The real fucking world? First of all, if you write a screenplay without conflict or crisis, you'll bore your audience to tears. Secondly: Nothing happens in the real world? Are you out of your fucking mind? People are murdered every day! There's genocide and war and corruption! Every fucking day somewhere in the world somebody sacrifices his life to save someone else! Every fucking day someone somewhere makes a conscious decision to destroy someone else! People find love! People lose it, for Christ's sake! A child watches her mother beaten to death on the steps of a church! Someone goes hungry! Somebody else betrays his best friend for a woman! If you can't find that stuff in life, then you, my friend, don't know much about life! And why the fuck are you taking up my precious time with your screenplay? I don't have any use for it! I don't have any bloody use for it!

So unless you can beef up what the fuck is occurring in this goddamn script, I suggest you stop writing right now and work for the Federal Government or some other lame-ass endeavor!!!

Sincerely,
Robert McKee


Note: I believe an acknowledgment and/or apology is due to Charlie Kaufman here.

Thursday, July 10, 2008

Cult Update

I realize I haven't posted one of these in awhile because:
a) I was away last week and the week before and so didn't go to weigh-in.
b) The image that most accurately captures my WWing over the past couple months is this:



As of this week's weigh-in, which was on Tuesday, I'm NOT at my 10% goal, but not far from it.

To be honest, I've been a little relaxed about the whole thing because I look better, I feel better and I'm fitting in smaller clothes. I do want to lose a little more, but I've been sort of "enjoying the moment," so to speak.

Anyway, enough is enough. I've recommitted to taking it more seriously and so hope to be posting lots of Scrabble boards in the coming weeks. With enough point-counting and pilates, I could even make it to goal weight by the end of August.

Big Read Update - Mystery Solved!

Courtesy of Laughing at the Pieces:

"UPDATE: Alan M. informs me that 44 and 51 have been left off the list since time immemorial, but he discovered them on the original list and I put them in their respective positions. He also found this link about the murky origins and intentions of the list. Thanks, Alan!"

I don't know who Alan is, but would like to add my thanks!

In case you're too lazy or just not interested enough to read the whole murky history, the answer to the burning question of where this list came from is: the Brits. At least some of them. There was a poll asking people for "the most precious book they have read." I can only assume the Brits interpret "precious" as "dear" rather then "cutesy." The list, published in the Guardian, is entitled, "Books you can't live without."

P.S. I have updated my original entry to add in the elusive #44 and #51.

The Queen of Discounts Recommends...

Ok, this is a little self-serving, but only a little. Those who know me know I am the queen of the discount, particularly if it's for plays or restaurants.

So, I recently discovered this site that has discount tickets to all kinds of things all over the country: plays, comedy shows, concerts, sightseeing cruises, etc.

The hubby and I went to see Bill Maher at NJPAC a few weeks ago. The seats were cheap and great. We had a blast.

The site is totally free. You just need to register to use it. And, if you use this link to register, I get credit (read, an additional discount): https://www.goldstar.com/join?p=F689112N

I've only looked at the event listings for New York/New Jersey, but they also have events in:
- Metro DC
- San Francisco
- Chicago
- Los Angeles
- Boston
- San Diego
- Las Vegas

Intrigued? Then check it out. And tell'em I sent ya.

Tuesday, July 8, 2008

The Impending TV Conversion - Don't Throw Out That TV!

As you may have heard, after February 17, 2009, all the regular (i.e., non-cable) television stations will broadcast in digital format only. Viewers who receive their television free, over-the-air, using rabbit ears or a roof-top antenna and an analog television set will have three choices:
(1) purchase a digital-to-analog converter box,
(2) purchase a digital television set or
(3) subscribe to a pay service, such as cable or satellite delivery.

Research by Nielsen, the National Association of Broadcasters and the Consumer Electronics Association estimate that there are approximately 13-19.6 million households that only receive over the air broadcasts. That's a lot of TVs potentially heading to the landfill if folks choose option #2.

So, if you're in this situation, please consider purchasing a converter box (and make sure it's EnergySTAR certified). The government will even give you a voucher to offset the cost.

For more info, check out:
http://www.dtv2009.gov - you can request up to 2 $40 coupons here
http://www.epa.gov/ecycling/tv-convert.htm

The Big Read Mystery...

Ok, so we all know that I posted the "Big Read" list 2 posts ago. Since then, a couple of my fellow bloggers have posted the list on their blogs and a commenter on SharonGR's blog noted "where are #44 and #51?"

I have been trying to track down where they are but, more mysteriously, I can't figure out where the list itself came from.

Going through the blogger breadcrumb trail, I went through:
ktbuffy to
House of the D. to
The Perpetual Writer's Blog
and then dead-ended.

I also googled NEA Big Read 100 books and went through another blog trail which ends here:
The Publishing Curve

On NEA's Big Read page, they only have 16 featured books (and most aren't on this list of 100).

Can anyone solve this mystery?

I'm a Farmer!

Ok, not really. But we are growing tomatoes on our fire escape.

We picked the one that was ripe last night and used it in a salad with basil (also from our fire escape) and other ingredients from our CSA (lettuce, spring onion, garlic scapes) and it was YUMMY. But, look, there are more:


Can't see them? Here's a close-up: